Relax. Be Yourself.

Being yourself is celebrating you, as an individual – learning to express yourself and be happy with who you are. For some people, it’s learning to love yourself, for others, it’s not hiding who you are or changing things about you to fit in.

Define yourself. You can’t be yourself if you don’t know, understand, and accept yourself first. It should be your primary goal to find this out. Try to take time to yourself and contemplate your life and choices. Try to think about what kind of things you would or wouldn’t like to do, and act accordingly; finding out through trial and error helps more than you might think it does. You can even take personality tests, but be careful to only take what you want from them and not let them define you. Work on accepting mistakes and choices you’ve made; they’re done and in the past, so there is no use crying over spilled milk.

Stop caring about how people perceive you. The fact is, it really doesn’t matter. It’s impossible to be yourself when you’re caught up in wondering “Do they think I’m funny? Does she think I’m fat? Do they think I’m stupid?” To be yourself, you’ve got to let go of these concerns and just let your behavior flow, with only your consideration of others as a filter — not their consideration of you. Besides, if you change yourself for one person or group, another person or group may not like you, and you could go around in a vicious cycle trying to please people; it’s totally pointless in the end, and it leaves you exhausted. However, if someone you trust and respect critiques aspects of who you are, feel free to judge (honestly) whether or not it is accurate instead of accepting or dismissing the critique unconditionally.

Be honest and open. What have you got to hide? We’re all imperfect, growing, learning human beings. If you feel ashamed or insecure about any aspect of yourself — and you feel that you have to hide those parts of you, whether physically or emotionally — then you have to come to terms with that and learn to convert your so-called flaws into individualistic quirks. Be honest with yourself, but don’t beat yourself up; apply this philosophy to others, as well.

There is a difference between being critical and being honest; learn to watch the way you say things to yourself and others when being honest.

Relax. Stop worrying about the worst that could happen, especially in social situations. So what if you fall flat on your face? Or get spinach stuck in your teeth? Learn to laugh at yourself both when it happens and afterwards. Turn it into a funny story that you can share with others. It lets them know that you’re not perfect and makes you feel more at ease, too. It’s also an attractive quality for someone to be able to laugh at themselves and not take themselves too seriously!

Develop and express your individuality. Whether it’s your sense of style, or even your manner of speaking, if your preferred way of doing something strays from the mainstream, then be proud of it… unless it’s destructive to yourself or others. Be a character, not a type.

Have a productive day. Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and that some days, you’re the statue. People might raise eyebrows and even make fun, but as long as you can shrug and say “Hey, that’s just me” and leave it at that, people will ultimately respect you for it, and you’ll respect yourself.
Believe in who you are. If you’re always working to be someone you’re not, you’ll never be a happy person.

Be yourself and show the world you’re proud of the way you are! Nobody knows you better than you and that’s how it should be. You deserve to be your own best friend, so start trying to figure out how you can do that. If you had to hang out with yourself for a day, what is the most fun type of person you could be, while still being yourself? What is the best version of you? Believe in this idea and use that as your starting point. Love and accept yourself as you are now.

Follow your own style. The common thing a lot of people do is copy other’s actions because it seems like the better route to fit in, but really, shouldn’t you stand out? Standing out is very hard, yes, but you need to try avoid assuming other people’s perspectives of you. Maybe you like to sit outside on the deck under a umbrella in the middle of the rain, maybe you have different ideas of things, rather than other people, maybe you like strawberry cake instead of the common chocolate cake, whatever you are, accept it. Being different is absolutely beautiful and it attracts people to you.

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5 thoughts on “Relax. Be Yourself.

  1. D…I agree with your words, for the most part. As you’ve shared, we’re all human and we’re all growing. From the day we’re born until the day we die. We learn from doing — a multitude of experiences and opportunities in which we engage. When something works, we chalk it up and enter it as a must do, if it aligns with who we are. If it doesn’t work so well, then we chalk it up to a learning experience and a mistake that we not repeat. When we repeat those mistakes, over time, they begin to define who we are. Doing what we want and being who we are, works as long as it supports our path and goals set for ourselves. If not, we need to step back and ask why / why not, and what, if anything must / should be modified to get back on track. Perhaps our goals are out of line. Perhaps the goals are great, but we’re not a fit for those goals. A lot of checks and balances, reflecting, rethinking must go in to testing the waters and discovering fit for ‘us’. Bottom line is….if we’re not true to who we are, successis not possible / not long term.

  2. I LOVE your post Dimitri! Just a gentle reminder of the uniqueness of the human species! Thanks for the wave of positivity:)

  3. Isn’t it wonderful when one has a following and the alignment with ego…

    Not sure what you’re saying, D, in your response to my text.

  4. @ Vic, you said “Perhaps our goals are out of line. Perhaps the goals are great, but we’re not a fit for those goals.” I am saying that goals are never out of line and shant be viewed as “us” not fitting our goals but rather our goals fitting us.

Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data, ability to repeat discredited memes, and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Also, be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor even implied. Any irrelevancies you can mention will also be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous :)

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